Letting Go...

Let me give you an illustration. Have you ever been in this senario where you were just window shopping and you come across an item you like, and this item is only 1 in world...but you really like it! Then realise that you dont have enough money to purchase it and thought to yourself, "ok maybe I'll go save up and come back another time to get it". As you were saving up, every single time when you were at the mall you definitely would go find out if the item is out of stock...and every single time it's still there. So you go home feeling releived and happy, thinking that you would be the owner of that item soon! And so you continue saving and always checking on the item. Some time has passed now... then one day you get to the mall again, and decided to check if the item is still there. Then you were very disspointed this time, because you were told that the item was bought by someone else already. After all this while of saving up just to purchase this item, at the end you found out that everything just go by in vain. Leaving you to only one choice...to LET IT GO! (and maybe hoping to get something better than that) I'm feeling somewhat like the person in the senario above. It really isn't easy to let go something that you have been holding in your heart for so many years.

IT IS NOT THAT THINGS ARE DIFFICULT THAT WE DO NOT DARE.
It is because we do not dare, that things become difficult.

Yea it's just time to let go. Since that item will never be mine anyway. Perjaps I'm also just afraid to let go. Perhaps I dont dare to let it go. Because after that, the place that I once hold a great hope in, will then be empty. I dont want to feel empty. Maybe that's why I dont dare... and that's why it's so difficult to face the reality of things.

I remember I once read that quote from somewhere and thought it as such a good lesson to life. I used it to encourage 2 friends. Then I somehow forgot about that quote. Until today as I saw this quote again at Janet's blog. What a coincidence! Maybe it's time for me to take this quote and apply it now. So often it's so east to encourage others, but when it comes to dealing it and practicing it, it takes so much effort. It's so difficult.
I really need courage to let this go. I remember I once quoted in one of my post last year,

"Courage is not the absence of fear but the judgment that there is something more important than fear."
Again coincidentaly I came across this in Janet's blog again today, she said
Courage : an action that springs from the heart. All action inspired by a center of true love brings with itself security and firmness that cannot be disturbed. To be courageous is to know that fear offers no resistance to love.

How many times coincidences happen in a day? Having all these coincidences today prolly aint's coicidence at all. I was prolly meant to come across all this. This is prolly an awakening call for me to really let it go. Faec the reality. It's already gone Rach!

Guess I just need to remind myself that there's definitely something more important than fearing to give up this thing that I've been holding in my heart..and the important thing are the people around me whom I love. People who knows what I'm going through lately. Who care for me so much. They are so important that I should not dissapoint them, but instead take courage to overcome. I will place myself standing in reality ground, accepting the fact. Though I know it's going to be really tough because I have to face the thing I have to let so often. May God's grace and strength truly be with me. May this decision I make to simply allow love to be stronger than fear and that I know the decision I'm making at this point of my life is motivated by love.

p/s. Sorry if I sounded vague to some of you. I just wanted to start letting go of it here.